I was talking with a client this morning about honoring ourselves, really honoring ourselves and not in the bubble bath kind of way but in the true sense of self importance.
Yes a bubble bath is lovely, (by the way, in my last house I never had a bath and it made me sad as I realized how much I love a nice bath. Side note – I lie on my front in the bath, John thinks that’s super weird, anyone else??) but I am talking about truly honoring yourself. For example do you ever squeeze yourself out of your day? I used to do this ALL THE TIME, I would have every intention of working out, meditating, journalling, resting, finishing that project that’s important to me, prepping healthy food etc but then someone else would need me or should I say make a request from me and I would JUMP TO IT. I mean God forbid I ever let anyone else down eh? But me, yeah I can let myself down. That’s easy!
My default position is to be a pleaser and I have done this my whole life to avoid anyone feeling disappointment in me (that’s a whole other topic) so to re-train myself to place importance back on me was difficult but so essential in my growth. I mean if I can’t even make an appointment with me and keep it – how reliable am I actually?
This is something I have worked hard on over the last few years with my own coach to re-train and develop strategies to really honor myself in every way. It’s not been easy, and of course I slip back into pleaser mode frequently but bit by bit I have improved by creating new habits that serve me and letting go of old beliefs and programming around serving everyone else first.
I was unaware of my own boundaries essentially. Can anyone relate? I use some simple tools now to make sure I know mine and stick to them (the majority of the time – progress not perfection).
I have always thought that boundaries were restrictive but in actual fact they have been so freeing for me.
Do you know your boundaries?